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Climbing the Liquor Ladder: Going from Beer to Wine

Almost everyone remembers their first chugging: the faster the chugging, the
drink of alcohol. I remember mine like it less opportunity for tasting. Wine,
was yesterday. Taking a sip of my however, is meant to be tasted; it's
father's Bud Light when I was seven years meant to be savored. Each sip of wine
old, I realized it tasted nothing like should provide a new experience for your
the root beer I frequently drank, mixing taste buds, making your beer bottles boil
it with vanilla ice cream in large with increasing jealousy in the process.
plastic cups. As I concentrated on not
spitting the beer back in the can, Enjoy the Variety
knowing very well this would send my
germ-a-phobic father rocking in the While there are several different types
corner, I swallowed the beer with my nose of beer, most beer tastes relatively the
plugged and vowed to never drink again. same with some just not being quite as
bad as others. Two different bottles of
This vow was broken in my late teenage wine, however, can taste dramatically
years when beer bongs and keg stands were unalike. Wine drinkers are granted with
calling me, chanting my name in unison the ability to pick from a variety of
and performing the "slow clap" portrayed years, types, and flavors. They can
in inspirational moments in movies. But, choose red wine or white wine, wine from
the truth is, I didn't really like beer places as far as France or as close as
then and I don't really like it now. From Oregon. And, once engaged in a little
the cheap stuff filling the kegs of frat wine tasting, wine drinkers can find a
houses all over the world, to the more wine they really love.
expensive wheat beers served with an
orange, they've always tasted the same to Embrace the History and the Culture
me. They've always tasted bad.
Wine, in addition to being full of
That is why, after college, where beer taste, is packed with culture and
was just short of flowing from dorm room history. From the exportation of wine in
faucets, I decided to climb the corporate the 1st Century AD to the forbidding of
ladder of liquor consumption, with the the planting of vineyards by the King of
next rung up being wine. Spain, learning about wine allows you to
learn about the history of our world.
Initially I made this choice because of Drinking different wines from different
the health benefits of wine. Unlike beer, regions also allows you to learn about
with each pint providing more belly fat the values of those particular regions.
in alcohol's version of 8-minute abs,
wine possesses several things beneficial Behave Yourself
to a person's health, with particular
concern to the heart. But, health When drinking wine, you need to act like
benefits aside, I took this plunge you're drinking wine. Now, I'm not saying
because wine is so much more than you need to speak with an English accent
alcohol. or hold your wine glass with your pinky
sticking out at a 90 degree angle, but
However, taking the plunge from beer to wine demands a certain sophistication
wine wasn't easy. While beer is junior that beer refutes: when drinking beer,
varsity, wine is varsity. With wine, the more barbaric the behavior the
you're playing with the big boys and better. With wine, however, your behavior
there are several rules to keep in mind should contain a certain sense of
for a smooth transition. sophistication, behavior that points to a
bottle of Pinot Gris and says, "She's
Don't Play Drinking Games with me."
From Quarters to Century Club, beer was When it comes down to it, beer and wine
made for drinking competitions, being the are on different sides of the alcohol
game piece passing Go and collecting two spectrum. Beer, in hindsight, is kind of
hundred dollars. But, playing a drinking like the sippy-cup that prepares you for
game with wine may result in praying to the real thing. Wine, however, offers so
the porcelain God later in the evening. much more, and teaches you, above all,
While beer is made to be swallowed in why alcohol really is a median of nearly
large amounts, with the occasional belch every culture.Jennifer Jordan is the
being the only thing needed to make senior editor at With a vast knowledge
someone getting sick feel better, wine of wine etiquette, she writes articles on
isn't. Wine, simply put, is not a toy. everything from how to hold a glass of
wine to how to hold your hair back after
Wine should be sipped, not chugged too many glasses. Ultimately, she writes
her articles with the intention that
I have a theory that someone like me, readers will remember wine is fun and
someone who hates beer, was the each glass of anything fun should always
idea-person behind the concept of be savored.




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